3cubed

Tuesday, June 03, 2003

 
Divorce = It's OVER!

You would think when one person divorces another, that the person being divorced would figure out that pretty much means the relationship is over. Not so in the case of Mr. Pickett. Bobby has to my dismay, acquired a cel phone. This has led me to the assumption that the past several months of blessed peace from him stems soley from the fact that he had no private phone available in which to annoy the hell out of me. He has lost yet another job, is back on coke, & I am receiving frequent phone calls alternating between him calling me a stupid whore, proclaiming his undying love, and his desire to "end it all". On the upside, he is no longer trying to offer me money for sexual favors. THAT was really annoying.

We were discussing in one of my classes this morning about how parenting syles affect & shape the future personalities of children. Someone asked what if the parents each have totally different parenting styles, such as one being neglectful & the other being authoratative (ideal), would the child turn out okay since one parenting style was healthy? To which our professor answered that the parents usually come to some sort of compromise regarding child rearing, but that is something still being studied. I then asked what if that is the case with the parents but they end up divorcing & the non-neglectful parent retains custody of the child. He answered that almost all children of divorce end up mal-adjusted in some way and that the child would be better off with both parents including the one neglectful than in a single-parent household. He then elaborated by saying children of divorced parents do better the more contact they have with the non-custodial parent, even if they are neglectful. He did make the distinction of saying as long as the neglectful parent is not engaging in bahavior that would put the child in danger & used an example of an alcoholic parent who takes the child out while they're drinking. Although Bobby does fit the example, I do feel bad that Maggie doesn't spend much time with him. It is for that reason & my new fear that Maggie will be mal-adjusted, along with the fact that Bobby has been asking to see her for the past few days, that this evening I invited him to see a play with us tomorrow morning. After what happened last time, I am not leaving her alone with him & I do not want to have to hang out at his place with her, so I figured this would be a good compromise. They will be able to spend some time together and since it is a play, I will not have to talk to him.
Tina 10:15 PM